If you’ve been online dating for any length of time, you know how it feels to eagerly log in to check your messages, only to be extremely disappointed by what you read and delete them all. The online dating messages we send are the first and only impression we make on potential dates, and can determine if you ever score a date in real life.
To prevent your online dating messages from being deleted, here are four things you should avoid saying.
1. “Do you want to come over?” No matter how often you’ve emailed back and forth, instant messaged or talked on the phone, it’s important to remember that until you’ve met someone in person, you really don’t know them at all.
When you invite someone over to your house for a first meeting, you are putting both of you at a risk. Would you invite a stranger off the street into your home? Probably not! The same rule applies to online dating. First dates should always occur in a public place on neutral territory.
2. “I hate online dating.” When you imply that there is something wrong with online dating, you’re also implying that there is something wrong with the people who are using online dating-including the person you’re trying to talk to! Dating in general can be frustrating, but try to avoid being so negative about your past experiences.
3. “You’re so hot.” It’s been proven that physical compliments in an online dating message rarely go over very well. Even if you mean no harm, comments on how hot or attractive someone is often fall into the creepy category. If you are going to use a compliment in your message, try to find something non physical to comment on or at the choose something that makes the other person unique and show that you care about more than just dating a pretty face.
4. “I think we would make a great couple.” Again, you might mean this one innocently enough. Maybe many of the things written in their profile aligned with what you are looking for and you have tons in common and you think this could be a love match! Great…but keep it to yourself for now.
Remember that you haven’t even had an in-person conversation together yet, and sometimes things that look great on paper or on a computer screen just don’t pan out in real life. Chemistry can’t always be determined before you’ve met. Wait to make any declarations about a future together until you’ve spend some actual time in each others presence.
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