Text Messaging and Relationships

Written by on July 5, 2012 in Relationships - No comments | Print this page


LOL, rofl, Hmu, brb, ttyl, jk.  Those who text message know what the acronyms mean.   For everyone else, it may seem like a foreign language.  Texting is not only for teenagers and young adults.  In one study, 60% of people over 45 years old text as often as they make calls.  Females average about 6.3 messages per day and males 4.8 (Faulkner 2004).

There are some inherent negatives with texting.  First, texting isn’t deep.  Do not discuss sensitive or serious topics over text.  It is absolutely  disrespectful to break up with someone over text.  Body language, facial expressions and tone of the voice are all lost when you can’t see or hear someone, or when you’re distracted in person by a gadget.  Do not get to know someone you are interested in through texting alone.  There is no substitute for hearing someone’s voice and putting a human touch to the words of a text message.

Second, people hide behind texting and online messaging.  Do you ever notice that people are a lot bolder with their words when it is just texting or online instant messaging or even e-mails?  It has been said that effective communication have been weakened with the onset of all this technology.   Parents complain that their children’s grammar skills are poor and that they tend to use abbreviations because that is how they “talk” when texting.

Make it a rule that there won’t be any texting during dates.  Besides it being a turn-off, it is also disrespectful to be texting away on  your phone while on a date.  If this person is a new love interest, then he/she may think that you have no manners and may not go on a second or third date with you.

However, it is true that texting each other throughout a busy work day while on breaks can make you feel more connected.  Take advantage of what texting has to offer, but know the appropriate time and place for it.



About the Author

M. Yu

M. Yu is a single, working professional who lives in New York City. She has eclectic interests, ranging from cancer research (her day job) to traveling to writing for the Relationship Category on QLR. She has an active dating life and views every life experience as a learning lesson. View all posts about healthy relationships.