Why Are Older Couples Divorcing?

Written by on April 11, 2013 in Relationships - No comments | Print this page


Older Couples DivorcingWhat is Grey Divorce?

Grey divorce is the demographic trend of an increase in divorce in the older (grey haired) couples that have been married for 40+ years. It is somewhat surprising that people would stay together for so many years and then suddenly divorce.

It could be that they had always decided on a split and they were waiting for something, perhaps the children all being settled or maybe retirement before they did it. However there is another possibility and that is infidelity.

It appears that the baby boom generation, who are associated with rejection of traditional values, wealth and fitness, are getting divorced far more often than young couples.

What Are The Reasons?

For some couples it could be due to the empty nest. Couples who marry and have children young may find that when the children leave they have nothing much left in common anymore and have perhaps been miserable for some time.

They are still relatively young and can see a new and different life for themselves. Midlife crisis is most often to blame and this can happen to both the man and the woman. They suddenly feel attached to someone much younger and feel is more exciting than what they have at home.

It seems to be the husbands who complain that incompatibility and loneliness led them elsewhere. The wives tend to cite emotional abuse and infidelity during divorce. Some couples can never recover from a tragedy such as the loss of a child, an illness or a disabling accident and the only option is divorce, however illness can impact the finances to the degree that it eats away at the pension and before they know it they have nothing left.

Divorce can stop this from happening as the healthy partner can keep the retirement money while the ill spouse is taken care of by the state.

What About Retirement?

Retirement can have a huge impact on a marriage. If you have been married for many years and one of you has been the breadwinner and the other a homemaker when retirement comes so do the problems.

Firstly the homemaker, who is usually the wife, has been running the household and bringing up the children. When the nest is empty she begins a new life, still running the home and looking after the children and gran children but not 24/7.

She now has time for herself and possibly meets her friends for golf or lunch but is home in time for the breadwinner. The breadwinner will have worked most of his life to earn the money to pay for everything.

He is probably quite high up in a business, possibly his own, and he has a lot of responsibility. He might go out to lunch with clients and go away on business but he is always happy to go home to his wife for dinner.

The couple get on well and have had a wonderful marriage so far. Retirement draws near and he seems out of sorts he is feeling apprehensive about the change but is looking forward to the long holiday in the sun. She is looking forward to seeing him more but she is not sure what he is going to do with himself, she has left the golf brochure out for weeks but he has said nothing.

When it finally comes and the holiday is over the boredom creeps in and he begins to annoy the wife. They are constantly bickering over nothing in particular and it all ends in divorce when he takes up with another woman while his wife is out doing what she did before he retired.

Charlie Hodgson has had a lot of divorce cases in which there is infidelity. He is a private investigator who has worked with other private investigators carrying out surveillance and investigations into infidelity. For more blogs like this contact http://www.birmingham-privatedetectives.co.uk

Image courtesy of Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net


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